Wednesday, 24 August 2011

I made art

It's been a busy time and sometimes very hard emotionally as well, getting my head around being single again.  Plenty to sort out and new decisions to be made.  I've been trying to keep up with Kelly Rae's group that I joined but it's been hard work. I have to admit I am behind.

However - I made art!  I can't remember the last time that I honestly had the energy or the motivation to get on and feed my creative spirit. I had a canvas with flowers on it that I bought at a car boot sale and I loved it, but it had a scratch in the middle of it and I always had plans to paint over it.  I've had it about two years and it never happened!  I actually nearly chucked it out once.  At last I got on and started (and finished) it.  I had some problems, the canvas has some kind of coating on it, I didn't realise that before I started painting, but as I was putting paint on, I was also pulling it back off again.  Still, after much trial, here is my new mixed media creation.

Here's to happy beginnings :)

Wednesday, 17 August 2011

Starting Over

No more excuses about why I haven't written in so long.  No more excuses full stop!

I'm in a transitional period of changes.  I'm starting over and if I'm honest I'm scared.  After much thought and hesitation and fear I signed up for Kelly Rae Roberts e-course Flying Lessons I'm enjoying it a lot although I have to admit, there's a LOT of information and I seem to have slipped behind a little already.  Plus Kelly gives you life time membership to a private facebook group of fellow students and I'm such a facebook addict!  I have always loved Kelly's work and I'm happy to be doing the course.  I'm hoping this may be a new beginning for me.

I have lots of 'new beginnings' happening, my husband (of 15 years) and I have just separated and I find myself alone again at 46, I have 2 of my 5 beautiful children still living at home, a grandson turning one in September and another due in November.  I'm currently in turmoil about whether or not to re-home 2 of my 3 beautiful fur babies as I had a scare with one of them needing treatment last month and I'm wondering if I can afford to give them the best anymore?  I also need to get a smaller, more economical car and until a few weeks ago I didn't even know how to put Diesel in it! And I'm wondering whether or not we should move to a house without a garden as I find mine too much to cope with alone.  So many choices!  Part of me thinks it's not the time for making big life choices, but life has a habit of going on whether you feel 'ready' for it or not.

I'm trying desperately to see all this as an exciting opportunity for change, when the fear inside me just wants to believe life as I know it is over and I need to curl up in bed.

I would love to make the effort to keep up with my blog, kick start my art, make some new friends, get up, brush off and move on.  Really - I need support, I need cheering on and some days, some minutes, I need lots of it.  Here's to new beginnings and the courage to let go of what is, to make room for what's waiting for me.