Wednesday, 17 August 2011

Starting Over

No more excuses about why I haven't written in so long.  No more excuses full stop!

I'm in a transitional period of changes.  I'm starting over and if I'm honest I'm scared.  After much thought and hesitation and fear I signed up for Kelly Rae Roberts e-course Flying Lessons I'm enjoying it a lot although I have to admit, there's a LOT of information and I seem to have slipped behind a little already.  Plus Kelly gives you life time membership to a private facebook group of fellow students and I'm such a facebook addict!  I have always loved Kelly's work and I'm happy to be doing the course.  I'm hoping this may be a new beginning for me.

I have lots of 'new beginnings' happening, my husband (of 15 years) and I have just separated and I find myself alone again at 46, I have 2 of my 5 beautiful children still living at home, a grandson turning one in September and another due in November.  I'm currently in turmoil about whether or not to re-home 2 of my 3 beautiful fur babies as I had a scare with one of them needing treatment last month and I'm wondering if I can afford to give them the best anymore?  I also need to get a smaller, more economical car and until a few weeks ago I didn't even know how to put Diesel in it! And I'm wondering whether or not we should move to a house without a garden as I find mine too much to cope with alone.  So many choices!  Part of me thinks it's not the time for making big life choices, but life has a habit of going on whether you feel 'ready' for it or not.

I'm trying desperately to see all this as an exciting opportunity for change, when the fear inside me just wants to believe life as I know it is over and I need to curl up in bed.

I would love to make the effort to keep up with my blog, kick start my art, make some new friends, get up, brush off and move on.  Really - I need support, I need cheering on and some days, some minutes, I need lots of it.  Here's to new beginnings and the courage to let go of what is, to make room for what's waiting for me.


  1. Hi Beverly,
    I am in the Flying Lessons course with you and came over to check you out. After reading your current post, I just want to tell you how much I admire you. You embody the word "brave". Be gentle with yourself as you are creating a new path to walk down. Make art like crazy now, it will be your savior. It is mine.

  2. It is great to see that you are embracing the fact that it is okay to ask for what we need. We all need support and encouragment.

    Have fun making art and look at all the choices as an adventure!

    Enjoyed reading your post. Talk to you in Flying Lessons...